5 Misconceptions About Bisexual Identities
As Bisexual Visibility Month comes to a close, we pause to honor and uplift our bisexual community members. This month, and every month, we recognize that harmful myths and misconceptions about bisexuality still persist, often leading to real pain and exclusion. By naming these misconceptions, we take steps together to break down the barriers they create. Our hope is that shining a light on these truths will foster deeper understanding, compassion, and radical belonging for all.
1. Myth: Bi People Are “Confused”, “Secretly Gay” or “Can Choose to be Straight”
Reality: Bisexuality is not a phase, a stepping stone towards identifying as lesbian or gay, nor is it a sign of indecision. Bi people know who they are, what they experience, and who they love. Believe them when they tell you! Don’t try to convince them to love the person you want them to love.
2. Myth: Bi People Want to Have Sex With Everyone
Reality: Like anyone else, bisexual people have their own boundaries, preferences, and values when it comes to sexual relationships and sexual ethics. Being attracted to more than one gender doesn’t mean being attracted to everyone or wanting to be with everyone. Bisexuality is simply the capacity to be attracted to people of more than one gender.
3. Myth: Bi People Are Incapable of Being Monogamous
Reality: A person’s monogamous (or non-monogamous) relationship(s) have nothing to do with one’s sexual orientation. Being attracted to more than one gender doesn’t mean a person wants or needs multiple partners. This myth overlooks the various personal values, commitments, and relationships that bi people build every day.
4. Myth: You Have to Have Been Intimate with a Person of the Same Gender as Yourself to Call Yourself Bi
Reality: Sexual orientation is about attraction, not experience. A person doesn’t need to have had a specific type of relationship or experience to know who they are. Bisexuality is valid whether or not someone has been intimate with people of more than one gender. No one should have to “prove” their identity to anyone else.
5. Myth: You Are Not Bi if You Are in a Heterosexual-Presenting Relationship or Marriage
Reality: A person’s relationship status or the gender of their partner does not define or erase their sexual orientation. Bisexuality is about who someone is attracted to, not who they are currently with or who they commit to in life. Bi people in relationships that appear “heterosexual” to others are still bi, are still a part of the LGBTQ+ community, and their identity remains valid and real. Who you are always matters.
What would you add to this list?
We would love for you to add to the conversation on our social media channels (Facebook, Instagram, Bluesky, and Threads). You can also join our QCF Community Platform where we have conversations about LGBTQ+ and Christian topics and more!
